By Ejiofor Toochi
Living alone as a young woman can be an exciting and liberating experience. You have the freedom to set your own schedule, decorate your space however you like, and enjoy privacy and quiet without interruptions. But beyond independence, there are also challenges that no one prepares you for.
Here’s what you might not hear about living alone as a young woman based on the experiences of two women, Anie and Esther, who have lived alone for more than five years in Lagos, Nigeria.
Safety Becomes a Top Priority
One of the biggest fears young women have when living alone is safety. This becomes even more important in a country like Nigeria, where security can be unreliable, and women are more vulnerable to certain risks.
Anie shared, “I’ve taken a few precautions, such as keeping my doors and windows locked, and being mindful of my surroundings when I’m out and about. I also make sure to stay connected with friends and family, so they know my whereabouts and can check in on me if needed.”
While Esther lives in a relatively safe environment, she admits that she follows the same safety measures because one can never be too careful. For first-time renters in Lagos, prioritizing safety measures—such as getting secure locks, avoiding sharing personal details with strangers, and keeping emergency contacts handy—can make all the difference.
Bills and Budgeting Can Be Overwhelming
Living alone means more bills. From rent and utilities to groceries and other expenses, as a young woman away from your parents’ roof, you’ll quickly realize how expensive living alone in Lagos can be.
Beyond paying rent, the high cost of maintenance and utilities is a major concern. Esther shared, “Imagine getting home and your door refuses to open, or your tap stops running. And you know Lagos artisans—they seek every opportunity to rip you off.”
Anie also agreed that the cost of utilities and maintenance was an unexpected financial challenge she battles with, saying, “I wasn’t used to paying for things like electricity, water, and internet directly. It took some adjusting to factor those costs into my budget. I’ve learned to be more mindful of my energy consumption and to prioritize maintenance tasks to avoid costly repairs down the line.”
For young women planning to live alone in Lagos, having an emergency fund for unexpected repairs and learning how to budget when living alone can prevent financial stress.
Changes in Social Life
Living alone significantly impacts social life, and the effects can be both positive and negative. Without roommates or family members around, social interactions don’t happen naturally at home. However, it can also lead to unintentional isolation if social activities are not prioritized. Esther admitted, “I am an introvert naturally. I am one person who needs a push to socialize. I tend to always give reasons why I can’t go out, which is not good at all.”
This means when living alone as a young woman, you must make a conscious effort to maintain friendships and schedule hangouts to stay socially active. She added, “Living alone has actually helped me become more intentional about my social life.”
Loneliness May Creep in
There will be days when you crave company, but no one is around. This is especially worse when you make little effort to maintain your social life. “I make an effort to schedule outings with friends, which has helped me stay connected and avoid feelings of loneliness,” Esther shared.
For Anie, one big surprise is how much she enjoys the silence and solitude. “I’m an introvert, so I thought I’d appreciate the alone time, but I was amazed by how much more productive and focused I became. It’s been a game-changer for my mental health and creativity.”
Final Thoughts: Is Living Alone as a Young Woman Worth It?
Independence for young women is a big step, and living alone in Lagos is a major part of it. While it offers freedom and privacy, it also comes with financial responsibilities and security concerns. Esther advises, “Don’t be too caught up in the excitement of independence. Remember the goal and the need to truly move out before doing it. Itemize your priorities and ensure that you keep that emergency fund for repairs.”
Are you currently living alone or planning to? Share your experience in the comments!
